30 Days Done

As I’ve said before, every January I try to do 30 straight days of Yoga with Adrienne. I love that she does this every year and it gives me an opportunity to build momentum for the year ahead of me. Today marks the end of January, thus I have done yoga for 30 days straight. (31 days really, because I did yoga on the 1st of the month too, even though her 30 days doesn’t start until the 2nd)

I feel accomplished. I feel like I can do this year right. I have a lot of things planned for this year, some big changes are coming that haven’t been announced yet, and I am pumped. I want to step forward with confidence. I may not get it all right, but I can do it. I am smart and I am capable.

I am setting goals for myself to make myself a better person, inside and out.

What goals are you setting? I’d love to hear them.

Advertisements

Balance

Life is a lot about balance. You balance work and home. You balance chores and relaxation. Balance the things that need to be done, like homework, and the things you want to do, like watch Netflix or read a suspense novel.

I feel out of balance sometimes. My kitchen is cluttered because someone was working on our pipes. The work is finally finished now, but we haven’t put the effort into putting things back to normal. My living room is cluttered because every time we open a piece of mail lately, every time I open a piece of mail, it gets set on the coffee table instead of in the trash, where it most like belongs.

My room is cluttered because it always is. Nothing’s changed there.

But I don’t feel like doing anything about this, at least not right away. I’d rather do something interesting, or at least that lets me procrastinate longer. I forced myself to do the dishes today. It literally takes only five to ten minutes to sort and load the dishwasher. I finally put away the clothes that I pulled out of the dryer two days ago. Again, that couldn’t have taken more than ten minutes. So why do these tasks seem so daunting sometimes?

I understand the concept of balance. I understand what needs to be done. It just feels like a lot sometimes. Most of the time. But I really want to learn balance this year.

How long is 10 minutes?

The biggest thing about Alabama in the summer is that it is hot and humid and being outside is hard, especially if you don’t get into a routine early.  I’m not going to make excuses as to how or why, but I, once again, failed to get into a routine.  Thus, running or biking when the sun is out is just not a wise decision.  I want to be active, but I don’t want to die.
One thing that I’ve incorporated into my life over the last couple of years, but definitely even more in the last couple of months, is yoga.  I’ve been trying to do yoga for 20-30 minutes every day that I can, which, luckily, has been most days.  I do Yoga with Adriene on YouTube, in case you’re wondering.

Today I went to the next video on the September playlist and it’s 41 minutes long.  I’ve worked out for longer than that many many times in my life before, but I’ve felt weak lately.  I’ve felt that I can’t do much.  I’ve felt overweight and out of shape and so many other things that probably aren’t true.  But we all tend to perceive ourselves differently than we actually are, don’t we?
So I almost skipped the 40 minute video.  Because ten extra minutes just felt too long.  I felt too weak.  I felt like I might feel too tired afterward.  But then I thought about how I usually feel after I do yoga.  Unlike other workouts, when I do yoga I just feel good.  My mood boosts in a different way.  My body doesn’t feel like I’ve done a hard workout, it just feels… I don’t know… good.  I told myself to do the 40 minute video.  It wasn’t hard.  Those ten extra minutes weren’t even noticed.

So I wonder how long ten minutes even is.  What else could I do for ten minutes that I might not even notice?  Could I do ten extra minutes of cleaning?  My house would look that much better.  Could I spend ten extra minutes outside with my dog?  Maybe when it cools down.  Could I spend ten minutes writing, so maybe my mind might be clearer, like it used to be?  I decided to find out.

What could you do for ten minutes?

That Was Today?

Today, I have done seven minutes of yoga.  I have watched far too many episodes of Parenthood.  I have washed dishes.  I ordered Chinese food.  I walked my dog.  We cuddled too.  Now we’re sitting on opposite couches.

You know what I didn’t get to do?  Go look at the sun.  Because I don’t have eclipse glasses.  I did get to see the little crescents through a colander.  And all of the photos my boyfriend sent me.

It’s just strange that this is a monumental time in my life.  It’s the only chance I have to see it.  Two seconds was long enough I think though.  Because the idea in my head is more exciting than the actual event.

It was just nice to have a day off I think.  That’s all I think.

Body, Mind, and Soul

We are told to love ourselves.  We are told to stay healthy and eat right.  We are told to exercise.  We are told to go to church and to find a good community.  Because all of these things are important.

But I think we get too focused and forget the main point.  Love yourself.

I set a New Year resolution to go running and do yoga four times a week.  And I’ve done great.  My mileage is up, and I am stronger.  I look better.  I feel better.  But I’ve also been opening at work almost everyday and not sleeping the best.  So some afternoons I’m just tired.  And the last two or three weeks I’ve felt almost under the weather, but not quite, so I’ve napped, and then not felt good enough to go out on a run.  My boyfriend tells me it’s fine, and that it’s good to give myself a rest, but instead I beat myself up over it.  It depresses me that I’m so tired, and I’m so tired because I’m depressed.  I keep feeling like if I miss a day of exercise, I will be fat.  I’m terrified to lose my routine again.  It’s like I forget why I’m doing it in the first place.

I want to be healthy.  And it’s so easy to just focus on one realm of health.  It’s so easy to focus on clean eating and an exercise routine, but then forget to nourish your mind and your soul.  It’s easy to get caught up in a mantra of a having a healthy mind, but neglect your spirit and body.  It’s easy to beat yourself up if you miss church, so you focus only on that, but forget that your body is a temple and your mind a control center.

I am one, whole person.  I have a mind, a body, and a soul.  (Some would say I am a soul, but that’s beside the point.)  I’m not going to get fat if I occasionally skip a run because I’m exhausted.  My happiness is just as important as my appearance.  And no one hates me, especially not God, if I want to stay home and sleep in on the occasional Sunday morning.  Church is for community, not salvation, anyway.

Love yourself.  Body.  Mind.  Soul.

Resolving to be Stronger

I’ve started running again.  My favorite human and I decided to make healthier choices in 2017, because that’s a cheesy thing that people do, and we’re gonna do a 5k together in May (or we’re planning on it).  So I’ve been running a couple miles four days a week and doing yoga everyday and eating healthier.

Last week I was tired.  I went on one of my longer runs and I wasn’t super motivated, but I knew I had to do it.  I needed to get this run in.  Not long after I started my run, I looked across the street, and coming up the sidewalk, moving the opposite direction that I was running in, was a man in a wheelchair.  He was alone.  And I thought to myself, if he can do it, than I can finish this run.  And I did.  I was motivated.  Because I am strong.

I needed new jeans.  I went to Huntsville with a friend and I was looking for a size for in a certain wash and cut.  I have been wearing a six, but I know that I can fit into a four, so I wanted a four.  I was being loud, in a comical way.  We were digging through the piles of jeans at Old Navy, because I wanted that size four.  I then overheard the girl shopping next to me ask the attendant for help.  She couldn’t find a size 18 short in the color that she wanted.  And I felt bad.  Because I was complaining about not being able to find a four.  I never did find the four, so I had to buy a six anyway.  But they are loose, so there’s that.

I’ve been thinking about how everyday is a new day.  It doesn’t matter how much you eat on one day, you still need to eat enough calories the next day.  Your body resets.  If you mess up on Monday, that doesn’t mean that Tuesday is going to be bad.
A lot of people think that 2016 was terrible, and they’ve given up on 2017.  My roommate has already given in to drinking, when she said she didn’t want to this year.  It’s still the middle of January.
But I’m not giving in.  I’m resolving to be stronger.  Failure will only motivate me.  Doesn’t matter whose failures they are.