Fully Compromised

Blue and red shimmers
Empire state building weddings
East coast overheard
Drunken conversations

This is not me
Though maybe it’s more myself
Than I have ever been
Tipping the scales of my broken heart
Never go home alone

No one wants to be on their own
Not tonight
Searching for something
That hearts can hold onto
As they break all over again

I can’t hear you anymore
And I feel as though I have nothing to say
I want to feel you
As I am carried through this
Kicking and screaming
Who will I be on the other side?

The heart wants what it wants
As the soul bends under the pressure
Tainted and stained
Can you still find me?
I just want to be wanted

Somewhere back there
The path disappeared
Following a rabbit trail
That leads to only the wrong places
Can you feel the love?

Wondering how far a person can go
Before they’re changed forever
Am I changed forever?
Do you even recognize me?

As though a rescuing needs to happen
Already saved
Maybe secure
With nothing left to hold onto

I think I used to be holding onto you
Until I let someone else hold me
Impure
Wash me clean

Inside of lies
Wondering where the truth is
As I fall on my knees
Sucked dry of everything
Begging for stillness
Except asking for nothing

Not even sure what I want anymore
Trapped inside a mess of confusion
No one can get me out
Only myself
Only I won’t

Refusing to remember who I was
Was I even happy then?
Fully compromised

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