Dreams…

I always thought that when I got older things would be different
And not that things are exactly the same
But I think I’m still playing the same game
And I still haven’t changed my last name (not that I want to because although I’m older, I still feel so young)
And maybe things are different, I have more freedom, more homework, more responsibilities…
But I have less of some things too.
Less friends, less sleep, less… motivation?

Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a complaint but,
When I look back at all I was ready to run away from
It’s like it all followed me here.

And they tell you your whole life, “Don’t be afraid to make your dreams come true”
But always forgetting that nightmares are dreams too
And they tell you to wish and wish and wish, because wishes can become reality
But they don’t tell you till you’re older to “be careful what you wish for”
And every little girl is told “don’t worry, your prince will come”
But I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to rule a kingdom with a castle
They say “reach for the moon, you may land on a star”
But leave you the part about the star being a flaming ball of gas.

So maybe I’ve been afraid to dream
Because it seems a little bit pointless
To hope for things only to be let down
So maybe I was hoping to dance the night away, but I don’t want to go alone… and no one asked… again…
And maybe I do want to get married someday
But how can I expect to love someone forever when I can’t even love the same song for longer than a few weeks?
And maybe I don’t believe in love…
I’m not talking about God’s love, I know that’s real, but romantic love, between a man and woman?
Yeah, love is talked about all the time, but I’ve never felt it
I’ve always thought that love was something felt at every waking moment, being head over heels, and always on my mind, but that’s not something I know…
And I’ve heard all these theories, “you haven’t met the right guy yet,” but I think that the right guy hasn’t met me, because I’ve met plenty of guys, but none of them have been interested in, well, what they see, me.

Honestly, I’m scared.
Because in less than two years I’ll be on my own, with no place to go, and if I dream big, if I dream true, if I dream real, I don’t want to fail
But I once heard that if I dream big enough, it won’t matter if I fail
And why would God give me these dreams if he wasn’t going to use them in some way?
So I don’t know exactly what I’m doing, where I’m going
But I’m ready to wish, to love, to dream
Because it’s time to unleash the courageous lion inside of me to roar, roar, roar so loud that every ear will hear these dreams coming true

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2 thoughts on “Dreams…

  1. justjabari

    “And they tell you your whole life, “Don’t be afraid to make your dreams come true”
    But always forgetting that nightmares are dreams too” –> awesomely stated

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